Most of the time, when people are asked with this question, they answer the first choice paired with the reason that, “When things go awry with your lover, your friends will always be around for you and that they will never leave your side”.

Well, I actually do not agree with that ‘reason’ 100% percent (well, I agree but just not 100% of my being) of it because I believe that, naturally, people, even if they are the best of your best friends will eventually somehow leave your side (whether temporarily or permanently) for of course, they will have to attend to their own business or thing. I anchor my reason to the principle (rather philosophy) that man by nature is selfish, that man is a utility maximizer and that he satisfies himself first before satisfying needs of the people around him (thanks Colin Hay for inspiring me).

For example, if you chose your friends over that someone you romantically love, what happens then to you? What will you do when your friends are busy and cannot accompany you? Are you gonna go together with your friend and someone he loves and be that annoying third party who doesn’t go away? (Save me from those people who say it’s alright when really it is not all right) Also, what if you didn’t choose the person you love? Will you be alright if say, you chose your friends over that person you love, and that several years later you accidentally bumped into him on a street with a kid in tow and a ring band on his ring finger? What if he was actually ‘the one’ and you just let the perfect opportunity to be together with him over your friends and so your supposed-to-be ‘the one’ has found another and yep, got married? Will you be okay with that? I think this is why we are called ‘individual’ because at the end of the day, you go to your own bed, to your own house; you solve your own problems and stuff.

So in my opinion, I’m choosing my lover over my friends (yes, and I know it sounds quite harsh but yes that is my choice). I’m a big sucker for fate and destiny and I believe that once you found your ‘fate or destiny’ grab the chance and never let him go. Yes, things might go awry with ‘him’ but if you love him (really love him) you will not give up so easily, right? Marriage is there for the both of you to have and to hold, divorce or annulment is not the wise option to resort to if your relationship goes on a rocky stage. You resort only to this option when love is not present between the two of you anymore.

Therefore, answering this kind of question would be similar to the, “Who do you love more: your father or your mother?” kind of question. It’s frustrating and it’s endless but in the end, you are bound to make a choice and that choice will affect the people around you or even hurt them. So I guess whatever the choice you make, choose it wisely and that make sure you incur the least liability.


A/N: I hope I’m making sense. 🙂



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